Tuesday, February 22, 2005

request to repost the "How to send me hate mail"



Honestly, if you're going to take the time to tell me how much you hate me, make some effort to do it in a way that's not going to bore me. I've been called an "asshole" so many times in hate mail that it's just lost all its charm, as have all the major profanities. So, I take points off for profanities, unless they're used in really new and exciting ways.

Here's a quick workshop on that, using that old reliable, "Fucker":

"Fucker" -- No good. Plain. Uninspiring. Trite. Hardly registers a blip. Needs oomph. Needs... a modifer!

"Toad Fucker" -- Better. "Toad" is not the usual modifier here, so that's good, and of course it's an interesting mental visual

....."Choad Mongering Krill Fucker" -- Now we're talking. This insult works on so many levels. "Choad," of course, is a great piece of slang, not nearly utilized to its full potential in everyday invective, so it's still a nice fresh slap to start the insult. "Mongering," likewise a great verb: Sounds great, first off, but also obscure enough to thrill -- after all, who mongers very much anymore? "Krill Fucker" implies that you're so hard up you'd screw a baleen whale's morning snack and, inasmuch as krill are microscopic shrimp, it also says you have a dinky little wanger (otherwise, of course, how could you fuck a krill? It'd just break apart). ....

Sunday, February 20, 2005

How to be insulting with class


a sample :

You are not as clever or as funny as you might think. We will see whowins the next election. Better get someone besides Gore if you want towin. A "W" woman

Hmm, I'm not as funny or clever as I think, but apparently I'm clever enough to make her want to write to me. Okay, I responded to this one, too:


Of course my buddy Mike Gallagher reads my e-mails on his radio program.But Liberal Idiot Molly Ivins doesn't have the time to write back. And she knowsI'm right. I don't apologize for backing someone who stays above the desk insteadof having young girls below. Still a "W" woman with a brain thank you very much.Only the liberals have to resort to insults to make a point.

Wednesday, February 09, 2005

Reminds me of jesse Jackson: lot of Jews there


Did you ever hear anybody say, "Don’t go into that neighbourhood, it is very dangerous, there are a lot of Jews there"?

Just seem to indicate that the more intelligent people are also wise and tranquil

Ann Þ